Expectations

I have really neglected my blog. Apologies, I've been busy with school and all. I can't believe I am now the holder of a masters degree. It hasn't really sunk in yet. It honestly feels like it was just yesterday I was preparing to travel to the UK and now I'm back and have completed my studies. I guess time really does fly when you're enjoying yourself. Well, I am back and I still feel as though I am trying to figure out which direction I want my life to take. I have always been passionate about health so I strive to make an impact in the global health arena.

Since I've been back I have realised that people have these expectations from you which you are expected to live up to. I have watched most of my high school classmates get engaged, married and have children and I feel people are now expecting me to follow suite in terms of my personal life. I guess it makes sense since I have attained a second degree and the next step would be finding "Mr Right". With my track record, I don't forsee that happening anytime soon. I feel as though I need to figure out where my career is heading and get settled in that aspect of my life first. That's my priority right now.

I in no way feel pressured to find a husband or marry. I don't know why. It just has not bothered me. I actually don't think I'll get married and if I ever do it'll be when I am past the age of 33 most probably.  A part of me, however, does feel broody. I see babies ad I catch myself imagining what one of my own would look like. Little fingers and little toes and a cute little nose. Anyone who knows me knows I have a thing for babies. I absolutely adore them. So much so that I find myself looking at the baby section in shops. It's such a problem yet I can't help it, anything baby related is so stinking cute. It's strange how I drift between not wanting children at all and feeling broody.

Anyway, I am expected to marry and have children in the near future. I'm just not sure this is what I actually want. I've been struggling to feel motivated to do anything at the moment. I do hope that that this feeling soon passes. All in all, I'm beginning to realize that I don't need to live up to anybody's expectations but my own.